Well, we went to the doctor today (as we will every week from here out) and we got an ultrasound to check up on the little girl’s weight. Since Steph has gestational diabetes there’s a risk of high birth weight if her blood sugars stay too elevated. Luckily Steph has been doing a great job of eating well (and I’ve been doing a great job of feeding her, if I do say so myself) and her blood sugars have been great.
So, even though there was no real reason to worry we were quite relieved today when she weighed in at 6lb 4o. Actually we weren’t relieved at all. Somewhere along the line we got it in our head that they gain a pound a week at this stage so doing a little math put us on track for a 10lb baby! We were relieved however when the doctor told us we were nuts and that an ounce or so week is much more like it. She says we’re right on track for an average 7lb baby, which we’re thrilled about (especially Steph since she’s got to, well you know).
So here are a couple of shots we got of her. The first is a good look at her face and her puffy little cheeks and the second is a good look at the girl parts.
I have been thinking a lot lately about ‘lasts’, as in “is this my last weekend without a baby” or “is this my last gator game” et cetera. This sounds negative, but for me really it’s not, it’s just more curiosity. Everyone tells me that my life is going to change, and that it will never be the same, but for the better.
It occurred to me the other day though that you never hear anyone talk about their lasts. You never hear about that last anything once they have kids, you only hear about the firsts. You’ll never hear someone say “I remember our last weekend before we became parents” but people will go to their graves with the image of their child’s first steps burned into their memory, and that’s really exciting.
So I thought I would take a moment and reflect on some of the firsts I have to look forward while in the midst of so many lasts:
- My first sight of her
- Her first breath
- Her first cry
- My first chance to kiss her
- Her first time grasping my finger
- The first time I look into her eyes
- Her first smile
- Her first steps
- Her first words
- The first time she tells Amme “No!”
- The first time she tells me she loves me
- The first time she understands what it means when I tell her I love her
- The first time she helps me dig a hole in the ground to plant a flower
- Her first day at school
- The first time I have to put the fear of god into some boy that likes her
- Her first (and last) ‘C’ on her report card
- The first time she can mow the lawn
- Her first kiss, and finding out about it 3 weeks later
- The first time she falls in love
- The first time I can mend her broken heart
- The first glance of her in her wedding gown
- My first chance to ask her ‘how about some grandchildren’
- The look in her eyes when the first realizes all of the amazing firsts in front of her
Sort of makes it easy to understand why the lasts fade from memory.
Well we’re almost there. After this week Linnea’s lungs will be fully developed, which are pretty much the last bit. As of next weekend she’ll be full-term, and all bets are off. Next Tuesday we go back to the doctor (we’re going every week now) and we get to have another ultrasound. So far she seems to be a normal size says the doctor, but we’ll get a better look next week. We’ll be sure to have ultrasound pictures up ASAP. Until then, how about some belly!
Well, almost week 35, but this shot was taken last night. I got a new camera, so of course I had to get artsy fartsy with this week’s shot, but I think it makes her look beautiful 
We took our first “newborn care” class last night and we learned a lot of interesting things that some may want or need to know, or at least find interesting. Next class we learn all the calming tricks (we’re actually watching ‘The Happiest Baby on the Block’ for those who are familiar with it) as well as the dreaded ‘changing diapers’ but this week we learned some more general info about parenting and infant needs.
- This first one is the most interesting to me, which I already knew but didn’t know how important it was, which is this: a baby who is attended to quickly in the first 3 months will cry significantly less from 3 months all the way to two years. That is to say that the old theory of letting a baby “cry it out” is not only less effective in the short run but also makes the long run that much worse. The basic idea is that an infant under 3 months has no wants, only needs. When any of their needs are not being met they do what they need to have those needs met. That usually starts with squirming or squeaking a bit. Crying is an extreme response the the baby resorts to when more subtle responses have not been effective. Does this mean that every time your baby cries it’s in extreme distress? Of course not. In fact, babies only have one cry so they will cry just as loud/hard/long no matter which of their needs is not being met, which is to say a burp and hunger will produce the same excruciating cry. But, by getting to your baby quickly whenever possible, before that last resort response in invoked, they will be easier to calm in the first three months and will be less likely to resort other ‘extreme responses’ later in life.
- In addition to the above, studies have found that children who’s needs are quickly attended to have better relationships with children their own age later in life.
- On average, a newborn cries 1-3 hours a day, and does not only cry when something is wrong, though normally their cry is a response to something being wrong. Any attempts to calm the baby should be tried for at least 2 minutes or not at all. In other words, if you are shushing your baby either be prepared to do it for 2 minutes or don’t do it. The good news is that most things work within 2 minutes. I’ll be honest, I am not so sure about this one in practice, but it’s a sound idea and warrants consideration.
- Beets, turnips, carrots, collard greens & spinach should not be prepared at home until the baby is 1 year old. Commercially grown root vegetables are usually grown in high-nitrogen soils and the nitrogen can leech into the vegetables in quantities that can be harmful to infants. Even organic produce does not guarantee a lack of nitrogen as an organic designation pertains mainly to pesticides, and not to natural soil conditions. Even if you grow these things on your own back yard, if you do not know your soil conditions you are taking a risk. Ingredients from companies like Gerber and other baby food producers are grown under very strict conditions and are therefore safe. This is an important distinction as these foods are not harmful in and of themselves but should not be prepared at home. In case anyone doesn’t already know, honey and tree nuts also should not be given under any circumstances in the first year.
- The American Academy of Pediatrics strongly discourages spanking, as it has been conclusively shown as a precursor to infanticide (that’s precursor, not cause) and has been shown to be among the least effective of behavioral modification techniques. Now, I don’t have a strong opinion on the matter, I wasn’t spanked much, and had never assumed I would spank my child much and never assumed I wouldn’t ever spank. I suppose my feelings going into things is that it is a last resort to be used in extreme circumstances when no other method is working. I can’t say that my overall opinion has shifted from that, but it’s food for thought. There should always be a better way of getting your intended result than resorting to negative physical stimulus. An example that was given is that if the consequence of a child running out into the street is that they get a spanking, then what happens when you’re not around and the threat of the spanking is off the table? Instead, in this example, the teacher suggested to give an exaggerated response of fear, even to the point of pretending to cry, and let your child know that what they did was dangerous and scared you. Your child’s desire to make you happy and their desire to not hurt you will always be stronger than the fear of a spanking and you’re building the foundation of character and responsibility. Can I say I will never ever spank? Of course not. But knowing that it is at best a bad short term solution and at worst holds the potential of doing long term damage I will certainly think long and hard before I ever do.
- America has the highest rate of infanticide and the highest rate of spanking. Sweden has the lowest rate of infanticide (0.01% of the U.S. rate) and corporal punishment is illegal there. Correlation or coincidence? You be the judge.
- During the 1990s over 90% of children were spanked. In the first half of this decade, 2000-2005, that number has not gone down at all.
- Only 1 in 12 daycare centers are rated ‘good quality’. Six in 7 are rated as ‘poor quality’.
- The number one problem day care centers face is a lack of staffing that results in caretakers being unable to provide the best of care for every child, resulting in at least one child being given less than optimal care. While there are federal regulations dictating the ratio of children to caregivers, these regulations are absolute minimums and are unfortunately the norm. Although those minimums are always supposed to be maintained the reality is that often times a caretaker is out sick and there are no ’substitute teachers’ in the daycare world, thus each remaining caretaker has to pick up the slack and all of the children under there care get less than optimal care. Is this the end of the world? Probably not. The fact is though that at any point a child’s needs may have to be ignored to a certain extent. What if it’s your child? Who’s to say what needs can slide and what needs trump the other crying baby? And what of all that attention you’ve paid to avoiding the “cry it out” paradigm? Now your child is spending 5 days a week with someone who has no other option? Better day care centers will have 1 caregiver for every 4 infants, and those are the good ones. But even with the best caregivers with the best intentions, taking care of 4 infants at once, one of which probably colic, one of which has an ear infection and another who is sick, what are the chances that your happy healthy baby is the one that gets attention, and what’s more, what are the chances that it comes home as happy and healthy as when you dropped it off? Very interesting and certainly something I never even considered.
- Most babies will not sleep through the night (10 hours or more) until they are a year old. My gut response to this is ‘crap’ but I don’t remember the last time I got 10 hours sleep and after the sleep deprivation I am getting ready to experience that will feel like a vacation.
- On average a child does not become fully potty trained until they are 3 years old. Girls usually get it a little quicker, but spend the rest of their lives complaining how hard it is to pee in public places and the side of the road.
- This one is important. Studies show a very significant drop in the SIDS rate for babies who sleep on their backs and for this reason an infant should always be made to sleep on their back unless your pediatrician explicitly states otherwise. The reasons for this are not completely known, but the correlation is undeniable.
- Recent studies suggest that a pacifier may help lower the risk of SIDS, although this is not proven.
- This last one is a bit of a hot topic, but there has recently been very limited studies that suggest that common immunizations may be linked to Autism. The fact is, the specific study that “suggested” this theory was very small, and flawed at its core. Many, many studies since have shown no correlation between the two and despite the fact that modern immunizations are now mercury-free (the theory was that the mercury was causing the Autism) the Autism rate is unfortunately still on the rise. Simply put, we don’t know the reason the rate is rising, but we know what reasons are not the cause. It also stands to reason that the risks your child faces by not being immunized FAR outweigh the potential downsides. Simply put, there is no science linking immunizations and Autism, only theories, and poorly formed ones at that. It is unfortunate that this unfounded scare tactic is causing parents to put their children at risk for serious, legitimately life threatening diseases that were cured decades ago. This is of particular concern to us, as Gainesville has a particularly large Hare Krishna population. Krishnas do not believe in immunizations, which is certainly their right, but it does put other non-immunized individuals around them at greater risk.
That’s it for now everyone. Hope that you found some interesting tidbits and I hope to hear everyone’s thoughts on the facts and opinions above
Our little girl is growing. According to the internet (which never lies) she’s about 4 lbs now. However mommy reports that she’s kicking harder than a 2 year old.
We got a great photo of Steph and Jill this weekend while on our last trip. From here out we can’t travel so it was nice to get down and get some salty air in our lungs.
We also got a chance to go to Babie-R-Us and get a few final things we needed before Linnea’s born. The things that remain on the registry are fair game for Christmas!
For Halloween Steph decided to be a green M&M and with a little help from our friends ‘paper’ and ’scissors’ (unfortunately ‘rock’ hd to sit this one out) we were able to get a nice little ‘m’ on her belly. The photo doesn’t do it justice, but it was cute.
Tuesday night we went to our next-to-last child birthing class and got to tour the labor and delivery unit as well as the maternity ward (which we had seen before). The good news is that the labor and delivery rooms are NICE so we’ll be very comfortable and surrounded with state-of-the-art equipment (sans internet access). The bad news (besides the lack of internet access) is that once we deliver, we have but a few scant hours in the ‘Hilton’ wing before we get wheeled down to the ‘Holiday Inn’ wing which, though it’s not the worst hospital room ever, is much more like a hospital room than the labor and delivery rooms. Did I mention there’s no internet? And I won’t have an iPhone yet? If only you all could see my tear-soaked keyboard right now.
Tonight we went to the “Meet the Doctors” dinner. It’s a nice idea because there’s a pretty decent chance that our doctor won’t be the one that winds up delivering Linnea. In reality though it was pretty useless (except for the free meatballs and the cheese platter). Thanks to the fact that we’ve been to the doctor 83 times, and have taken 2 of the 3 classes so far, and we watch ‘A Baby Story’ at least once a day, we didn’t really have any questions for anyone so it wound up being an exercise in small talk. It was nice to meet everyone, and reassuring that none of them are brain-eating zombies but rather are nice people, but I didn’t really have any doubts there.
So that’s about it on our end. We’ll keep everyone posted and for those of you that don’t have countdowns running on your computers (for shame), it’s 51 days, 4 hours, 2 minutes and 58, no 57, no 56…… 51 days, 4 hours and 2 minutes to go.
We got to hang out with Justin and Lexi this weekend for the Gator game. Unfortunately Lexi’s incredible cuteness couldn’t make up for the Gator’s incredibly lack of defense (or offense, or special teams), but still a good time was had by all and of course, I was right there with my camera. 
